Sunday, 18 February 2007

My Kind of Workout

Inspired by Katherine and Nicola I recently decided to dust off my weights and get back to doing some weight training. ( A year or so back I got into the habit of doing this and, once I got past my utter boredom with the repetitiveness of it, was quite pleased with the results - well, mostly the feeling of virtuousness that came along with having stuck to my goal. ) At any rate, on a few days last week I worked through some upper body routines and was, again, feeling very pleased with myself. This morning in the shower I realized that my arm and leg muscles were pleasantly sore - the kind of sore that comes from working underused muscles. Wondering why that might be - as I hadn't been back to the weights for several days - I thought about my activities the previous day and realized I had inadvertently come upon an excellent training program. Since I believe -due to the soreness of my legs and arms - that it works very well, I will share it with you in case you too care to torture yourself in this manner.

Step one: Using leg muscles, climb chosen apple or pear tree. Hang precariously from chosen limb, begin pruning back hard.
Step two: Stretch beyond the point of good judgement while holding, above your head, very sharp and pointy ( and heavy, by this point) loppers. Cut all water shoots.
Step three: Change positions to more precarious one, halfway out on thin limb, to reach the last bits rather than using a ladder like any sane person would do.
Step four: Climb down, get smaller pruners, climb up onto other limb, repeat process.
Step five: Climb down, get saw, climb up, repeat process.
Do 4 sets of 12 repetitions until your trees are looking rather sad and bald. Mind the branches that fall down and smash you on the bridge of your nose. Step back, admire your work, but don't get too pleased with yourself, you've still the branches to pick up ( great for the leg muscles).
Now continue this program through the cherry, walnut, hazelnut, peach, plum, apricot and various ornamental trees, not to mention the unruly grape vines and you have a workout worthy of Hercules.

Honestly, the excuses some people will come up with to avoid weight training, heh?


Andrea said...

hehe, I've tried the workout, myself! I think there are some water shoots calling my name!

Nicola said...

I intend to pay someone to prune my trees - I'd rather stick with the weight training!!!!

Mary-Sue said...

Hee hee! this is my kind of a workout! thanks for the good laugh...